Later, I was guiding a number of puppies – perhaps 12 – perhaps beagles – from the house to another location on the hilly, dried grass covered country land. They were super cute and playful and I was anxious about getting them to where they were going while enjoying their playful, vulnerable cuteness.

I once described a dream to a Jungian dream analyst on twitter called @thecarljung. The 140 character (or less) description of the dream was “still lake, dry grasses, bright sun, sex.” The dry grasses and feeling of that dream are very similar to the one I’ve typed up here. The response from @thecarljung was

Your dream paints a picture of a calm sense of self understanding

which was totally awesome and unexpected.

In researching puppies and litters of puppies I’ve interpreted my dream to mean that there’s some new playful energy coming soon that is full of creativity, intuition and self understanding. Yay!

You raise my hopes, then you raise the odds.
You tell me that I dream to much

…from a The Ubiquitous Mr. Lovegrove on Into the Labyrinth by Dead Can Dance.

The next thing to come from my mouth were incredible sobs. Heart-center-wringing sobs in a repeated rhythm every half second. I witnessed the whole process without much, if any, attachment to what was happening. There were no thoughts or feelings associated with the sobs. I went to my bed and screamed into my pillow over and over – the tears burned my eyes.

My dad taught me “Primal Scream Therapy” when I was a kid. He’d pick me up from the airport when I’d come for a visit and once in the cab of his red pick up truck (with his hand-made fiberglass trailer complete with woodstove, urinal, cooler and full-size murphy bed) he’d say “Enie, let me hear you scream.” He’d listen to me scream and then tell me to do it louder, which I would. This “conversation” lasted for as long as it took for me to scream with all of my body. I always felt a little high and VERY relaxed after those “therapy” sessions. He liked to tell me about this process when I was older and he’d describe how I’d arrive tense and uptight and after a few minutes of “PST” I’d be bouncy and happy-go-lucky again.

When I was just finishing college at MUM, I was given a beautiful jyotish quality pearl because it was recommended that I wear a pearl to support my moon and give me more emotional balance. When I put it on I screamed at the person I was sharing a house and car with, with such vigor that hot, burny tears came from my eyes and I was relatively disassociated with the feelings. The pearl allowed me to release what I’d had pent up inside me that was bothering me. I felt amazing after that “conversation.”

These three things are connected by the moon. The full moon was two nights ago at 1:40am. It is the Worm, Wind or Death Moon, among others in different cultures (these are Native American, Celtic and Pagan, respectively). I just within this last moon time, I spent 8 days diving under waves in the Caribbean Ocean, the most time I’ve spent in the ocean in 4 years (that’s one Leap Cycle!) if not longer. I’ve been cleansed by the Ocean and the moon. I’ve released my lack of commitment to being on Gaia and accepted a commitment to watch over and support another being on this planet. And with that commitment comes a renewed and strengthened commitment to doing all I can to support our planet.

This is the song that inspired all of this. Enjoy. It’s a masterpiece.

If you don’t see an embedded player (flash = boo!), click this link to listen to it on grooveshark.

Grilled pears
Nutmeg caramel
Organic pistachios

View from the kitchen window

View from the living room

The happy couple

saying goodbye to Pt Reyes

Since then, Shanny has surprised me with many presents delivered in unexpected ways, as well as an awesome surprise bday dinner. However, nothing comes close to what he just did for our 5 year anniversary last Sunday.

Rewind a few months to me getting a new job in a building with a jewelry store on the ground floor. I spied a beautiful bracelet in the window that looks like a silver octopus wrapped around the wrist and I fell in love.
We went to our weekly dinner party with our friends & when I brought up the jewelry store, Jim said “Oh, they have the most amazing octopus bracelet in the window!” and I said “yes, that’s what I was going to say!”
Every morning I would say hello to the bracelet on my way up to work and one day I saw it was missing and my heart sunk. I went in to ask about it and asked if they were going to get another. She wasn’t sure but took my name and number. I told her “I just hope that whoever bought it is really excited about it.” She gave me a big grin and said “yes, the woman who got it is very happy about it” and I left thinking I would HAVE to get it right away if they get another.

Okay, back to last Sunday. We decided we wanted to go to the restaurant Gary Danko since we couldn’t pull off a weekend away, like we usually do. We joked that we were saving money this way (it’s known to rack up quite an impressive bill for a restaurant, which is why this is a joke, tho, actually quite true). Dinner was delicious* & we had a wonderful time basking in their excellent service. Just before dessert, a staff member brings out a special covered dish with rose petals under the lid, puts it in front of me & says “here’s a little something special before dessert.” I was stunned (sorry, no photo – I was overwhelmed), shy & excited when I lifted the lid to discover a box wrapped in white paper with a little black 5 on it. I turned it over and there was Shan’s note “i <3 u" I gave him a big hug then, I think, tho, it's all a bit of a blur.
I opened the box to discover the coveted octopus bracelet!

I know I gave him a big hug at this point and then showed our waiter who couldn't tell just what it is.
When I visited the bathroom (where I got to polish my boots!) I took this picture:

I am a very lucky girl. ♥

——-
* For foodies, here’s what we had:
We let them choose the wine to come with each course and I asked about not having a full glass with each of our 4 courses “because I can’t drink that much wine”. The waiter was very flexible and poured me a 1-2oz taste of each pairing and only charged me for two glasses, which was super awesome.

Amuse bouche
delicious lobster bisque w/ bits of fennel & peppers in a shallow bowl w/ an awkward spoon. I love it when the amuse is a soup served in a little cup so it’s easy to eat.
We both had a glass of bubbles, loved our own but didn’t care for each others’ choice. And that’s okay by me!

Appetizers
I had: a salad of dungeness crab, avocado, pink grapefruit, frisee & little bits of red pepper. It was delicious especially when I had a bite with all of the above items together. I LOVED my wine pairing (but forget what they all were – oops)
Shan had: pumpkin soup with dungeness crab and delicious little herbed biscuits. The crab and biscuits came out in the bowl and then the waiter poured the soup over them – deelish. He loved the viognier they served him to go with as it was a perfect fit.

Fish Course
I had: scallops that were almost cooked perfectly. I like them soft in the middle but these were probably seared for 30 seconds to long for that. They tasted great but one of the scallops was a little gritty, which I’ve never experienced before. I loved my wine pairing with this dish as well.
Shan had: lobster in a curry sauce that he thought was delicious. Another win with the wine pairing; he was served a local chardonnay.

Entree
I had: beef filet w/ some kind of marmelade and a flavored butter – it was perfect and I ate the whole thing. The filet was cooked exactly how I like it. I did find it strange that I wasn’t given a steak knife tho – my butter knife worked fine but I did have to make more effort than I wanted to. I wasn’t so into the wine pairing this time – kinda sour & too tannic.
Shan had: guinea hen breast with some amazing sausage & delicious potatoes and cabbage. He enjoyed the pinot noir they paired with this dish.

Dessert
I had: roasted pears with gingerbread and nutmeg ice cream. The pears were good but the gingerbread wasn’t spicy enough and was a little dry. The ice cream had some dry, flavorless coating on it and had minimal flavor itself. The wine pairing was my least favorite and I LOVE dessert wine, so that was a bit of a let down.
Shan had: chocolate torte that he refers to as a “snooze fest” of flavors. The shell was flavorless and the chocolate was rather mild. This time the wine pairing fell flat for both of us as he didn’t care for the “boring” porto they served.
BUT, they did send out a cute little citrus mousse cake for our anniversary, that was light and lovely, not amazing, but it made up for the others.

I had a GREAT day today:

:It started with discovering that my bike wasn’t outside in the rain but left in an indoor sanctuary – yay for a rust free chain.

:Then I got to share a cab with three people and only had to contribute the cash in my wallet (about $2 with another $2 owed a schoolmate who threw in $5 for both of us).

:Even tho I was late, so were a bunch of other students who aren’t usually and when the school pres asked us why so many of us “usually on timers” were late and we said “BART emergency” she said “Oh, that’s a good excuse then.” I still got a tardy but that’s okay, the next, or I should say LAST, six week cycle starts on Tuesday (which means tardy’s get reset).

:My last six week cycle will really only last for four more weeks, one of which is a week in Mexico for Thanksgiving! Yeah.

:I had a job interview yesterday at an excellent spa and I’m psyched to have gotten invited back for a second interview on Monday – it’ll be awesome to get this job for many reasons but I’ll save that for my next “good news” entry after I actually accept an offer.

:I got certified in TRUE makeup this morning (more good news connected to that if the above entry goes the way I hope and feel it will…). I love this makeup. It’s all mineral based and super kind to the skin. Read about it if you’re curious. Being certified only means that if I work in a salon or spa that sells it, I’m allowed to apply it to clients. And now I can do full makeup applications at school on my clients for free!

:I had a wonderful client this afternoon who rebooked for some waxing and bought the product that I recommended. I’m totally loving telling people about products and seeing their skin improve because of them. Did you know that 90% of the benefits you see in your skin after a facial come from the home care routine? It’s true. Think about that the next time you consider buying a face cleanser at the drug store.

:Tomorrow is Saturday, which is really my Friday, because it’s the last day of the week for me. Hopefully my crew and I will be going out dancing – sometimes we never actually make it out but we always have a great time.

Post script:
:Apparently, my horoscope for today is ALSO about positivity. Yay! I love it when things synch up.

November 3, 2006
Positive Outlook
Gemini Daily Horoscope

You could feel like pursuing your goals with resolve and purpose, which could make you optimistic about the outcome. Perhaps your zeal might be because you can picture a positive end result or because you refuse to allow negative thoughts to influence you. Keeping your focus on the future hopeful and positive today may make it easier for you to realize your goals. It might be useful to make a list of all of the characteristics you possess that will aid you in reaching your goals. By thinking of your positive qualities, you can concentrate on the potential you have to manifest your dreams, which can help boost your confidence in yourself. If you feel that you will be able to achieve your goals, then this power of positive thinking adds not only to your self-assurance but also puts a hopeful intention out into the universe.

Remaining positive about what the future holds allows us to put our energy into the most important thing that will help us reach our dreams..ourselves. Even though our dreams do not always happen exactly as we hope, we are most often the key to our own success. Having confidence in ourselves gives us the means to place our focus on what we need to do in a way that is meaningful and constructive. When we set our sights high and with optimism, the universe will respond in kind. By believing in yourself today, the universe will listen to your positive intentions and give you the means to reach your dreams.